Mullings A Political Cyber Column By Rich Galen

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Good Riddance

Friday, December 29, 2000

(Go to the Mullings Update page for the
latest political news)

Happy New Millennium. The old one ended with the kind of year which pretty much summed up the other 999 years of wars, famines, strange weather, and people generally being ugly with each other.

Millennium Number Three will be better. It has to be. That last one was, was � Number Two.

Amusing, isn't it, how a year ago we had thought 1999 had been so troubling and confusing? We couldn't agree on whether President Clinton should have been convicted or not. We couldn't agree on whether it was the end of the millennium or not. We weren't sure if 2000 was a leap year or not. We didn't know if things like clocks and airplanes and nuclear reactors would function properly or not. We couldn't agree on how high the stock market indices would go.

Little did we know. 1999 was a walk in the park compared with 2000.

Clinton got off in 1999 and we promptly forgot all about it, almost never mentioning it in 2000.

Nuclear reactors functioned just fine, but machines to poke holes in cardboard did not.

2000 WAS a leap year, but most of us think it was plenty long enough without the extra day.

We pretty much agree that THIS is the real end of the 2nd Millennium, but after taking into account what last years' celebrations wrought, most of us are perfectly happy NOT to consider spending $5,000 this weekend on a hotel room, a party, and a glass of Champagne.

Finding a stock market analyst who is willing to write a sequel to his or her prediction of a 20,000 Dow or a 10,000 NASDAQ is as difficult as finding someone who will admit they thought the collapse of the tech sector in April was just a temporary settling-out.

And nobody, but nobody - before or during - could have conjured up that business in Florida. And I'm not JUST talking about Elian.

On the subject of the recently concluded Presidential campaign, I DID say Bush was going to win ("We Win", August 4) and even pinpointed the date the campaign turned around ("It's In His Kiss", September 20).

Regular readers know I am not above risking real damage to my arm patting myself on the back. Although, I also take care to point out my all-too-frequent muffs. (Sharp-eyed readers will recognize that is just another way of patting myself on the back. Do you think I'm new at this?)

Having said all that, I never - for one second - thought that Bush would lose. But, I also never - for one second - thought it was going to be close. One for two on the Presidential front.

What sorts mischief should we look for as the calendar changes? Here's a good one:

We should keep a close eye on this business at the Democratic National Committee. Bill Clinton made another one of his midnight appointments by tapping Terry McAuliffe - his golfing buddy, his top fundraiser, and the guy who guaranteed the mortgage on that temporary housing up in Chappaqua, New York - to be the chairman of the DNC.

No problem, except for two teeny-tiny things. (1) The two party's National Committeemen and Committeewomen generally like to make these decisions by themselves when their party does not own the White House; and, (2) In a year when African-Americans voted Democratic by better than 9-1, Maynard Jackson, who was the first Black Mayor of Atlanta, wants the job.

Jackson has the support of Black Congresswoman Maxine Waters, who is a leader of Minorities in the House. McAuliffe has the support White Congressman Dick Gephardt, who is the House Minority Leader.

Hello? Lowe's Home Improvement Warehouse? What's the biggest wedge you got? Is it in stock? Good. I'll be right over.

Not that you care, but my favorite Mullings for the year is a tie. The very first one ("Norma-Rae! Norma-Rae!", January 5) is tied, in my mind, with the scene-setter from the Democratic National Convention ("Welcome to the Hotel California", August 14).

Jason Robards died the other day. Everybody remembers his Ben Bradlee role in "All the President's Men." I thought his best film role was as Murray Burns in "A Thousand Clowns."

Robards on acting: "I don't want actors reasoning with me about 'motivation' and all that bull. All I want 'em to do is learn the goddamn lines and don't bump into each other� Learn your lines, make a few faces, and go home."

Good advice. For almost every endeavor.

All new Mullings for 2001 begin on Wednesday.

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