The super-nova which continues to explode over Trent Lott's unfortunate lapse has now gone on for a full two weeks since the 100th birthday party for Strom Thurmond on December 5.
Martin D. Tullai, in the Baltimore Sun, has written a wonderful column on famous gaffes in American political history. One of them is this:
In 1988, just after [George H.W.] Bush was elected President, Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts was speaking to a gathering of businessmen in Lynn, Mass., responding to a question about newly elected Vice President Dan Quayle's qualifications. He said: "The Secret Service is under orders that if Bush is shot, to shoot Quayle."
Kerry was being facetious, but after complaints, he declared that he regretted his "inappropriate" remark.
Imagine the knee-slapping hilarity which would have accompanied a remark by a Republican Senator - ANY Republican Senator - if he had suggested that the Secret Service take out Al Gore in 1992.
By the way, Merriam Webster's Unabridged defines the word, "gaffe" as "a marked (especially social or diplomatic) blunder or clumsy mistake. It's etymology, according to the dictionary, is "probably of imitative origin; from the Scottish, 'Guffaw.'"
Some of the more famous gaffes in recent history never actually occurred.
The aforementioned Dan Quayle was widely quoted as having said during a visit to our neighbors to the south, "I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin harder in school so I could converse with those people."
He never said that. It was the punch line of a joke told by Republican Congresswoman Claudine Schneider of Rhode Island.
The aforementioned Al Gore was widely quoted as saying he had "invented the Internet." He never said that, either. What he said was, "I took the initiative in creating the Internet."
Gore was a sponsor of legislation which took what we now know as the Internet out of the sole control of the Pentagon and major research universities and allowed it to develop into what it is today. His claim was not without foundation.
Bill Clinton was quoted as saying "I never had sex with that woman ... Miss Lewinsky."
Ok, (A) he DID say that and, (B) it as not so much a gaffe as it was a, uh, lie, but I wanted to get that in to move to the next point.
Clinton weighed in on the Lott story by saying that Republicans who are criticizing Lott are hypocrites. "He just embarrassed them by saying in Washington what they do on the back roads every day," Clinton said.
Bill Clinton calling someone a hypocrite is like Sean Penn, who has a long history of Hollywood fistfights, going to Baghdad and crusading for peace.
Ultra Super Double Secret Notice: In order to give you a first-hand report on the Norwalk Virus, the Mullings Clan is putting out to sea starting tomorrow. We will be on a thoroughly disinfected cruise liner in the Western Caribbean for the next week.
Only twice, since Mullings began in March, 1998, have I taken a break: Once when I
had that pesky cardiac bypass surgery. And second when my new (and very temporary) masters at GOPAC
decided Mullings was way too edgy for them.
I am taking the week off on a big, big boat; going far, far out to sea, where telephone
calls cost $9.00 per minute, and my intention is to read nothing more newsworthy than the cheap
detective novels (which used to be called "dime novels" but now cost $24.99) I am bringing aboard.
I may get the Norwalk Virus, but I shall be warm. I'll be the one on the Lido Deck in
the surgical gloves and black knee socks.
Merry Christmas.
On the Secret Decoder Ring today: A GREAT Catchy Caption of the Day, a link to the full piece in the Baltimore Sun, and the Travelogue links.
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