Three Outs. Let's Strike
Monday, February 14, 2000
Donald Trump is announcing today he will not be seeking the Reform Party nomination for President. First, Warren Beatty dropped out as a candidate for the Democratic nomination. Friday, Jesse "The Boa" Ventura left the Reform Party. Now this. The three most colorful characters in this - or maybe any - election cycle are out.
The emergency meeting of the Reform Party over the weekend was more like an emergency meeting of a Reform School. All they needed was Mickey Rooney to run for Head Boy and Father Flanagan to act as referee.
Former pro wrestler Ventura, whom one would have thought would have felt right at home at a professional chair-tossing event like the emergency meeting, was not around to see his hand-picked chairman get bounced from his job which, of course, Jesse knew was going to happen which is why he resigned the day before. See how this works?
With Ventura gone and Trump out of the running, Pat Buchanan - remember him? - will now have a clear shot at the Reform Party nomination and the $12 million plus in your tax dollars which goes with it.
Before Pat and his sister Bay begin spending that money, I have two words for them: Ross Perot.
Speaking of dandy fights, South Carolina has become a terrific battleground between George W Bush and John S McCain. Dan Balz' report of the campaign in yesterday's Washington Post read like the recap of a boxing match as much as the summary of a political campaign.
Bush and McCain are much more fun to watch now than they were before the New Hampshire Primary when both campaigns were acting like they were warming up for a really, really important croquet match during color war at sleep away camp and they were having a most disagreeable chat over who would use the yellow mallet and who the green.
The Mullmobile will hit the road Wednesday and report from South Carolina in the regular Friday edition of Mullings, with special editions on Saturday and Sunday. Remember, this election is on Saturday, not Tuesday.
Hillary Rodham Clinton Rodham who (despite traveling on government airplanes, being driven in government limos, and being constantly surrounded by Secret Service agents) is trying to portray herself as a Woman 'O The People, was touring upstate New York last week when she had a photo op eating at a local restaurant. She left without paying and didn't tip the waitress. Former First Ladies - and many other high ranking officials - are often given their meals for free. But someone always - ALWAYS - finds out how much the meal would have cost and leaves an inappropriately high tip for the wait staff.
Years ago President George Bush was hammered in the press because the story went out that, being shown a scanner at the checkout counter of a store, he seemed surprised that such technology existed. The spin was that Bush had been VP and President for so long that he didn't even know about scanners. The truth was, he was being shown a new high-tech scanner which could figure out what a bar code was even if it was partially covered up or torn.
Let's see a similar display of media outrage at Hillary's apparent lack of understanding that most people who didn't used to live in the White House, and don't currently live in guarded castles, actually pay for their meals at some point before leaving a restaurant.
Goodbye, Mr. Schulz. Thank you.
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