Title: “I’m Going Long in Kimberly-Clark” In stock trading one can either go “long” i.e. betting that a stock will go up; or go “short” betting the stock will go down. That exhausts my knowledge of the stock market despite watching CNBC every morning when Imus is on vacation or has the flu.

“… I’m buying Kimberly-Clark stock. Or Becton Dickenson.” Kimberly-Clark makes Kleenex. Becton Dickenson makes examination gloves.

“… Dole (and McCain) will wait to see …” Published reports have it that Forbes is preparing a $50,000 PER WEEK television ad buy with no end date.

------------------------------

“The Day The Earth Stood Still”

Here was your assignment for this morning from Wednesday’s Mullings: “I do not have a clue who should play the Michael Rennie role – mysterious, tall, handsome, good at math, heals fast, great with kids, travels well … Suggestions?”

Here are some of the responses. Notes in parentheses are by the contributors:

*Rush Limbaugh *Bob Kerrey *A cross between George W and Bill Bennett *Fred Thompson (experienced actor, but in that tin foil suit he'd look like a burrito ready to pop into the microwave) *Bill Clinton (except he's a little too good with the kids) *Trent Lott *Mitt Romney *John McCain *Barney, he’s good at math (here’s a guy who learned to count with no more than four fingers on each hand!) *Warren Beatty (he heals fast as evidenced by his plastic surgeries, and he’s handsome -- he travels with his own vaseline-coated camera lens and flattering Joan Collins peach lighting) *Tom Cruise on stilts *Ronald Reagan *Two people named themselves *One named her pet golden retriever *One woman wanted to be cast as Michael Rennie’s love interest

One person wrote to say that Newt Gingrich could never play the Sam Jaffe role of the weird professor, “that would require Newt admitting there was someone in the universe smarter than he was.”

A lobbyist wrote to in and claimed “If you stand in the Capitol and say, “Klaatu, Barada Nikto” all the elevators will open at once. Try it!”

Finally, I suggested that the Hugh Marlowe character was” narrow-minded, self-absorbed, self-promoting, and jealous of everyone…” Patrick Burns wrote: “A little tough on old Hugh, don't you think, Rich? Some jerk from outta town (WAY outta town) moves in with your girlfriend and starts playing Daddy to her brat …”

Thanks to all. Now, get back to work.