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Take a Mulligan, Al
Wednesday, May 31, 2000

  • TITLE: "Take a Mulligan, Al" A mulligan is a golf term defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as "a free shot sometimes given a golfer in informal play when the previous shot was poorly played"

  • "I-Was-The-Model-For-Jonathan-Livingston-Seagull-Too" Al Gore once claimed he and Tipper were the models for the book, Love Story. The story - as the book - was fiction. Jonathan Livingston Seagull is a book published in 1970 and written by Richard Bach. One summary goes as follows:

    In just around a hundred pages, Richard Bach manages to capture the essence of being. And the creature that he lets loose on this chase for reason and meaning is one that is ... a seagull.

    Jonathan Livingston Seagull is an outcast, condemned to live his life away from his flock, punished for his brilliance and ambition. When the other seagulls are perfectly happy living for food, flying only to be able to find food, Jonathan Livingston Seagull is living for flying itself, for mastering it.

    Read this enchanting story about a gull going his own way and what he learns from it. You just might learn something about your life as well."

    In the dictionary, under "cloying," is a picture of the front of this book. Which is why JLS was THE most popular bridesmaids' gift of the entire decade of the 70's.

  • "…H.R. Haldeman, T-L- Squared." H.R. Haldeman was Richard Nixon's Chief of Staff. T-L-Squared was a notation he often put at the top of memos with which he was displeased. It stood for: Too Little, Too Late.

  • "Jumpin' Jack Flash." A Rolling Stones song. Lead singer, Mick Jagger.

  • "… crappie" From the Encyclopædia Brittanica: "either of two freshwater North American fishes of the genus Pomoxis, family Centrarchidae (order Perciformes). Crappies are rather deep-bodied fishes that are popular as food and are prized by sport fishermen. They are native to the eastern United States but have been introduced elsewhere. They may attain a length of about 30 cm (12 inches)--rarely more--and a weight of about 2 kg (4 pounds).

    The white crappie (P. annularis) generally inhabits rather warm, silty lakes and rivers. Silvery, with irregular dark markings, it is usually lighter in colour than the similar black crappie, or calico bass (P. nigromaculatus), which tends to frequent clear lakes and streams.

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    Texas under Governor Bush:

  • 1st in student improvement on test scores, especially for African-American and Hispanic students.
  • 1st in reducing the amount of releases and disposal of toxics - more than all 49 other states combined.
  • 1st in the nation to allow a patient to appeal an HMO's decision to deny care.
  • 1st to create a prison ministry to help offenders reintegrate into society.
  • 1 of only 3 states to require reductions of harmful pollution from older, unpermitted utility plants.
  • 1 of only 10 "highly successful" states in reducing welfare rolls between 1995 and 1998.
  • 4th in growth in total personal income.
  • 9th in teacher pay, when adjusted for cost of living and teacher experience.
  • $1.8 billion investment in healthcare initiatives.
  • 1.2 million jobs created, representing more than 10 percent of new jobs created nationwide and 48,000 new businesses.
  • Lowest unemployment rate in twenty years -- 4.7 percent.
  • Doubled the number of adoptions of abused and neglected children in Texas.

    America under Clinton-Gore:

  • The number of uninsured Americans increased by more than 8 million.
  • Almost 70 percent of fourth graders in the highest poverty schools cannot read at basic level.
  • Teachers were victims of 1.8 million crimes at school, including 657,000 violent crimes.
  • Illegal drug use among high school seniors increased 78 percent.
  • Federal prosecutions of gun-related offenses decreased by 46 percent.
  • More than 12,000 U.S. soldiers are on food stamps.
  • Enacted a $115 billion tax increase on Social Security enefits.
  • Federal government is the nation's largest polluter, costing taxpayers nearly $400 billion for cleanups.
  • 45 convictions, 72 indictments/misdemeanor charges, and 8 imprisonments related to the 1996 campaign finance scandal, improper conduct by Clinton-Gore cabinet officials, and Whitewater.

    What did Arkansas look like when Al Gore joined Bill Clinton in 1992?


  • 50th in environmental policy initiatives.
  • 47th in per capita state spending for education.
  • 43rd in per capita spending for higher education.
  • 41st in citizens living in poverty.
  • 45th in children living in poverty.
  • 47th in children without health insurance.
  • 45th in children living in hunger.
  • 43rd in infants born with low birth weight.
  • 47th in personal income. _________________________

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