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 In The Beginning . . .
* I knew it would come to this. According to a modestly confusing series of statements from Al Gore's office on Thursday, it appears the Vice President now favors the teaching of evolution AND the teaching of creationism in public schools.
* Any fool can see what this is leading to (hence, I can see what this is leading to): A pan-religious (from Baha'i to Zoroastrian) fundraising event is being planned in California at which "Epiphany Al" Gore will announce he invented the universe.
* I have absolutely no doubt that Attorney General Janet Reno will slither out from under any responsibility for the FBI's disclosure that, well, maybe they did sort of throw - no, tossed, really - an incendiary device somewhere in the general vicinity of central Texas (where Waco happens to be located) the day the Branch Davidian compound went up in flames like an enemy fuel depot in a World War II Dana Andrews movie.
* Here's how you know your campaign is going well: Hurricane Bret could have hit Corpus Christi, Texas population about 316,000. Or it could have come ashore 160 miles to the south and hit Brownsville, Texas population about 326,000. Where did it hit? Kennedy county, population 438. Not four-hundred-thirty-eight-thousand. 438. Let's see, Ralph Reed used to work for Pat Robertson, now he's advising George W. Pat Robertson. Hurricanes. Heeeyyyy!
* A Saturday NY Times article by Sharon King dealt with the shopping habits of "Generation Y," about whom I had not previously heard. Ms. King tells us this generation is defined as children 12-19 years of age. According to this accounting, "Generation Z" must be composed of children aged 4-11. Those children not yet born up to age 4 will comprise, what, "Generation A-1?"
* Generation X is, of course, the previous population group and will forever be best known for replacing the phoneme "uh" with the word "like" as the vocal pause of choice in the English language.
* Going backwards seven years per, the first named generation, "Generation A," would have been shopping in New York in about 1838 which was about the time New Yorkers altered their opinion from thinking they were better than anyone else to the modern concept which is, like, there ISN'T anyone else.
* Speaking of things generational, here's the latest Beatty Boomer Alert: Warren Beatty's exploding popularity as the choice of the Unheard Left for the Democratic nomination continues with a front page article in Sunday's Washington Post and a segment on NBC's Meet the Press. Someday you will remember that you heard it here first, from Rich Galen, the very same person who predicted a 12-seat GOP pickup in the 1998 elections.
* Two Alexandria, Virginia items: (1) The sign guarding the driveway of the Downtown Baptist Church reads: No Parking. Violators will be Baptized;" and, (2) At the Alexandria Starbucks, Sunday morning, I was sheepishly explaining to the young man behind the register that I could never remember whether the proper order was "Grande Mocha" or "Mocha Grande." He said quietly, "The secret, sir, is not to care."
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