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 To Be or Not to Be. What Was the Question?
* So, First Friend, Vernon Jordan, is reported to have changed his story about having had breakfast with Monica. The White House, of course, will pooh-pooh this by saying everyone knows Vernon Jordan is too smart for the Republicans so this discrepancy in his testimony is minor, insignificant, not worth the trouble of explaining, and just another example of the over-zealous Republican House Managers trying to make something out of nothing.
* Keep in mind, the ENTIRE White House case is based upon the President's claim that "it depends on what your definition of 'is' is." The Hamlet Defense.
* First-Sister-In-Law-Once-Removed Barbara Boxer has, once again, proved she has the most highly developed sense of irony in the entire United States Senate. After defending Bill Clinton against any and all charges of any and all wrongdoing for the past year, she has called for the resignation of Ken Starr over the NY Times report that he has been looking into whether a sitting President can be indicted. How about calling for the resignation of the guy who lied in the first place?
* I attended the annual Congressional Correspondents' dinner last night as the guest of the Dallas Morning News. The last big dinner they invited me to, the Gridiron Dinner, I had to leave early because I got a piece of steak - which I was not supposed to be eating - caught in my esophagus. Carl Leubsdorf, Washington bureau chief, called and suggested that, inasmuch as they were not successful in killing me when I was their guest the last time, they would like the opportunity to finish the job.
* Reporters came up to me at dinner to see if my food had been cut up into little soldiers.
* There was a strange unease throughout the room for the entire evening. At first I thought it was just the terrible humor coming from the lectern. Then I understood it was the "End of Scandal" syndrome engulfing everyone.
* I have been saying for months, "I can be funny about tax policy. I don't need this scandal." Guess what? Now that it's almost over, the notion of being funny about tax policy is very daunting.
* Most of the reporters in the room, I think, were feeling the same gnawing, growing tension: Starting on Monday, February 15 everyone is going to have to be writing about tax policy. Or Social Security. Or Budget Resolutions. Get me a paper bag!
* Not only that, but those of us who have been spending at least one night a week on a Hollywood Squares Cable Chat Show are about to be returned to the dust bin of television history. I, for one, am becoming an expert on the Life of Princess Diana so I can still be a guest on Internight when the question will be: Diana's Last Night: Crown Jewels or Crown Royal?
* Major Garrett, of U.S. News & World Report, who is a regular on Chris Matthews' Hardball, suggested the formation of a former TV pundits' support group. We can sit around in the classroom of an elementary school and talk about trying to cope with the loss of the attention, the phone calls and, in the case of some of the male guests, the make up.
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