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 A Minister, a Priest, and a Rabbi Walk Into ...
* Given Bill Clinton’s unbelievable reference to “two drunks” when discussing the Irish peace talks, I can’t wait to hear what he’s going to say about Italians on this Columbus Day.
* I understand Reggie White is going to be hired as a speechwriting consultant. Reggie, meanwhile, is editing a book of ethnic jokes entitled: “Tuesdays with Earl: Secretary Butz Shares His Favorites.”
* It was the first time in just over a year that the White House had to trot out the word “inappropriate” in conjunction with Bill Clinton had done.
* Al Gore and Bill Bradley both spoke at the Iowa State Democratic dinner in Des Moines Saturday night. Gore kept rhetorically poking his finger in Bradley’s eye but Bradley knows a little something about drawing a charge. Watch for the elbows under the hoop as things heat up.
* Was I the only one who thinks that when Al Gore walked around the stage in Des Moines Saturday night he looked like Elizabeth Dole in earth tones?
* According to AFL-CIO president John Sweeney, Al Gore is going to get the union endorsement at its national meeting this month. Recently another union leader suggested there would be no endorsement saying it would look like the AFL-CIO was throwing a life preserver to Gore’s sinking campaign. Man overboard.
* How are we supposed to take the Reform Party seriously when the discussion over who should be its Presidential nominee occurs over a dinner attended by Jesse Ventura, Donald Trump and Woody Harrelson? They would qualify as the Moe, Larry and Curly of modern political thought.
* Annette Bening appeared somewhat less than overwhelmed with enthusiasm about husband Warren Beatty’s nascent Presidential bid when she was quoted as saying: "I would support fully whatever Warren chooses to do. That's all I will say at this time." She didn’t even the infinitive split.
* The great travelogue of 1999 continues. This weekend I am in Western Massachusetts watching the leaves change color. The only problem with the Berkshire area is that it is too close to New York City. Last night we overheard a woman say – you have to read this aloud to get the full effect: “He says I complain too much. It’s so anNOYing!”
* Another true story. At a Japanese restaurant a mother to her eight-or-so-year-old son staring morosely at raw things wriggling on his plate: “I see you growing in a culinary and a mental way.” Get me the National Association for the Prevention of Tics in Children on the phone, immediately!
* In Great Barrington, Mass. there is a lovely little shop called the Church Street Trading Company which is located on Railroad Street but has a sign on the door saying, “Please enter on Main Street.”
* Stockbridge is the former home of Norman Rockwell, Daniel Chester French, and Alice’s Restaurant. It has a different name now, but it really is “around the back, just a half a mile from the railroad track.”
* In a college game with a lot of local interest, Brown beat Princeton 53-30. What would be a cheer at a Brown game? Quarks are sol-it-ary; mag-ne-tism’s paired; E still e-quals, M-C-squared!
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