Mullings A Political Cyber Column By Rich Galen

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I Was Just Rubbing These Two Donors Together and �

Monday, August 28, 2000

Watch for this: A headline in yesterday's Dallas Morning News read: "Today Could Match No-Rain Record For N. Texas" which describes the last 58-straight-days without precipitation. The Gore campaign will blame George W. for this.

A headline in yesterday's Bozeman (MT) Daily Chronicle read, "Landowners frustrated by firefighting effort". The Gore campaign will blame George W. for this, as well.

The National Interagency Fire Center web page notes that, so far in 2000, more than six million acres have gone up in smoke. And it's only August. The previous high, er, water mark was just under 4.5 million acres for all of 1996 which was also, you may remember, during the Bill Clinton/Al "I'm-Hot-But-Not-That-Hot" Gore administration.

Go here for a peek at the Fire Potential Map.

In fact, a check on the Mullings calculator shows that since the Clinton-Gore-Burn-Baby-Burn administration took office there have been 491,569 fires which have burned 25,193,656 acres. For those challenged more than two commas, that translates to just under a half million fires which have destroyed over 25 million acres.

The Gore campaign will blame George H.W., George W., George P., Jeb, Barbara, and Millie Bush for this.

On Tony Snow's Fox News Sunday, Condoleezza Rice, senior foreign policy advisor to the Bush campaign, encapsulated the world view of a Bush administration with the following: "Weak neighbors export problems."

Look at a map. Tennessee shares its western border with Arkansas. Al Gore understands this concept of "neighbors exporting problems" in his bones.

The New York Times ran a front page story headed: "As a Senator, Lieberman Is Proudly Pro-Business" Gore communications director Mark Fabiani said on Sunday, Joe Lieberman is "a man of impeccable reputation, takes money from whomever wants to support him but votes his conscience."

Here's a graf from the Leslie Wayne and Don Van Natta, Jr. piece: "During his two terms in the Senate, Mr. Lieberman closely aligned himself with three industries -- insurance, high technology and health care -- that are the main sources of his campaign contributions, and whose lobbyists say they are pleased with how he has promoted their agendas in Washington." [Emphasis mine]

Ms. Wayne? Mr. Van Natta? Please call Mr. Fabiani: 615-340-2000.

Ralph Nader, in an appearance largely ignored by everyone but the Portland Oregonian, spoke to a rally of more than 10,000 in Portland over the weekend. He took shots at both Gore and Bush, of course, but it is the Gore folks who have to be worried about those kinds of numbers in the Pacific Northwest.

Here's a dateline you may never see again as long as you live: Ushafa, Nigeria (AP) - That's the dateline of the story by Anne Gearan on Bill Clinton's visit. Here is a map of Nigeria from the Information Please Almanac: You will notice you cannot find Ushafa on that map.

The Gore campaign asked Bill Clinton to stay out of the way. Ushafa, Nigeria is as out of the way as you can get.

If the Gore campaign and the Bush campaign are arguing over the size of a tax cut, haven't we already won this argument? The Gore supporters are back to their last line of defense: "It's not fair."

Here's unfairness for you. On CBS' "Survivor", Rich Hatch had to live on some remote island for a month, eat rats and grubs, scheme and plot against 15 other people, and generally descend into proto-civilization mode to win a million dollars.

On ABC's "Who Wants to Be�" all you have to be is a geek who has had no life - other than being the sleep-away-camp Trivial Pursuits champion three years running - to win the same million dollars.

More For Rich! More For Rich! Hey, wait a minute. That DOES sort of sound like a Republican tax chant.

Tiger Woods finally figured out how to make a golf tournament boring. Get to 18 under after the first two days, then go birdy-eagle-birdy-bogey-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par-par on the next 25 holes.

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Copyright © 2000 Richard A. Galen

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