Mullings A Political Cyber Column By Rich Galen

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Your Beatin' Heart

Monday, July 2, 2001

In the movie "Our Man Flint" a spoof of the James Bond genre, a large IBM computer is given the task of finding the perfect man for a particular spy mission. All of the attributes are fed into the machine which then spits out one punch card with the name of the person who meets the criteria: Derek Flint.

The first I heard that Vice President Cheney was going to have his procedure done was when I got a phone call from a reporter while in the Cincinnati Airport, Friday morning on my way to Maine for a Saturday GOP seminar.

All of the information I got about the Vice President's heart for the rest of the day came from further calls from reporters wanting to know what I thought.

It was if, when reporters fed into their IBM card reader the attributes: Middle aged, Republican, strategist, bypass surgery, and knows the players, one name came out: Derek Galen.

I know nothing about the Veep's particular cardiac issues - at least no more than the White House put out to the reporters who called me.

What reporters wanted to talk about was who might replace Mr. Cheney if he were to step down but, inasmuch as there is no reason to think he WILL step down, there was not much profit in spending time on that.

Cheney is known around Your Nation's Capital as "The Prime Minister" because of the extraordinary breadth of his portfolio. There are those who believe he is more than a Vice President; that he is really a Co-President.

When The Lad was a tyke he went to day care because everyone else in the family (me and the MDofS&P) had paying jobs. Back in the day, there was a good deal of discussion as to whether children in that condition would suffer from not being clear on who their true parents were.

The Lad was never confused as to the identity of his parents.

Washington is not confused as to the identity of the President.

The success that the Administration has had in its first six months, is largely due to the people the President chose to have around him. People like Cheney, Chief of Staff Andrew Card, and senior VP advisor Mary Matalin, have long experience in Washington. People like Karen Hughes and Karl Rove have long experience with George W. Bush.

As the Administration got underway - remembering the foreshortened pre-inaugural period - having people like Cheney, Card, and Matalin were, arguably, more important than Hughes and Rove because this Administration did not make the kinds of mistakes which have become common when a Governor (Carter and Clinton come to mind) has rolled into town.

As time and events have moved forward, however, the out-of-towners have gotten better and better at the ways of Washington and the essential nature of Cheney's involvement in almost every important issue will be less vital - not less important, and certainly not less valuable, but less vital.

Good sources confirmed, over the weekend, that the public statements about the Vice President's prognosis matched the information which was provided internally.

This is excellent news for the nation as we approach Independence Day. Dick Cheney is exactly the type of person the Founding Fathers (or Brothers) had in mind when they were designing our government.

A person whose heart, however dented, beats in time with America's soul.
"I'll take "Names" for 50, Alex."
"Names for 50� Jacob and Emily."
Beep.
"Yes, Derek?"
"What were the most popular names for baby boys and girls born
in 2000? "

That, according to the Portland, Maine Sunday Telegram.

Speaking of Maine, I had to fill my rental car with gas before returning it yesterday. Regular gas. If people could fill the tank of a rental car with coal tar sludge they would do that. As opposed to the Mullmobile which has tasted only premium.

Anyway, the price at a station near the airport was: $1.34 per gallon. How can this be? Lobsters are cheap in Maine. But they grow lobsters there.

One last Maine story: I went to Freeport which is the home of L.L. Bean but only after having an argument with the AT&T One-Touch operator over the fact that the area code she gave me - 608 - did not exist in Maine which is 207.

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