Mullings: An American Cyber-column By Rich Galen

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It's Summertime - 2003

Monday June 16, 2003

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In the time-honored Mullings tradition of being the first to point out the obvious, according to the US Naval Observatory, summer will officially arrive this coming Saturday at 1:34 pm Greenwich Mean Time.

In one of those "There's a bathroom on the right" episodes, for years - decades - I thought the refrain from the song, "It's Summertime" went: "It's time to drink straight buttermilk," instead of the more widely accepted version of the 1962 song by The Jamies, "It's time to head straight for them hills."

Here in the East, the meteorological doggerel: "April showers bring May flowers" has now extended into the middle of June.

June thunderstorms bring - what - July mosquito swarms?

According to the National Weather Service, May was "the second wettest" month on record at Dulles airport; the "daily highs at Reagan National averaged 7 degrees below normal;" and "the 20 days with measurable precipitation" tied the record established in "July 1904 as the most such days in any month since records began in Washington."

The current issue of Scientific American (not known as a house organ for the American Hydrocarbon Association), cites a report from a group of scientists out of Columbia University (not known as a front for the American Fossil Fuels Coalition) that an increase in solar radiation over the past 24 years "could account for a significant component of the climatic warm-up that is typically attributed to human-made greenhouse gases."

June rains bring clogged up drains.

As part of the French government's intense effort to reverse the anti-French sentiment still running strong in American, they sent their defense minister, Michele Alliot-Marie, out on Friday to say that "American industrialists are pursuing a logic of economic war," and that US Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, "believes the United States is the only military, economic and financial power in the world." She added, the French government does not "share this vision."

This diplomatic cloudburst was based upon the refusal of the US military to take part in the annual Paris Air Show which began this weekend, plus Secretary Rumsfeld repeating his "Old" versus "New" Europe formulation while in Germany last week.

According to the Singapore Straits Times, Rumsfeld, "highlight[ed] contributions by eastern European nations in the global war on terror, but mentioned none of those by France and Germany, the main opponents of the conflict."

While all that was going on, it was reported this week that France has dropped to number 17 in the list of travel destinations for Americans. France typically ranks in second place just behind Great Britain.

For this, I apologize. If I hadn't actually GONE to France a couple of weeks ago, it is quite likely that, as a preferred destination for Americans, France would now rank somewhere below Bangladesh. I will endeavor not to go back to France until - ever.

Hillary v. Laura: On Friday night, I did the Keith Olbermann show on MSNBC. In the face of All-Hillary-All-the-Time, the issue was First Lady Laura Bush.

I didn't have to look far for a quote to make my case that just about anyone who has ever met Mrs. Bush, likes and admires Mrs. Bush.

Margaret Carlson, the Time Magazine columnist who is a card-carrying WELP - a member of the Washington Elite Liberal Press - AND a writer of brilliant gifts, has a new book out named, "Anyone Can Grow Up" which is a collection of her essays.

Here's what I quoted on the Olbermann show:

"Hillary Clinton wore us out, something the current First Lady will never do. [She is] as soothing as a warm bath...
"It matters who is a pillow away from the presidency ... It's impossible to judge a marriage from the outside, yet it's hard to picture Mrs. Bush ever darkening the President's day. The peace she carries with her spills over to him, and so to us."
- December 31, 2001

Think of someone with the grace and style of Audrey Hepburn wrapped in the warm blanket of a West-Texas accent. You think of Laura Bush.

On the Secret Decoder Ring page today: Links to Scientific American and the Singapore Straits Times; the early names of Creedence Clearwater Revival; a riff about Monkeypox which I didn't have room for in the column; a Mullfoto I think you will enjoy, and a photo of Mrs. Bush I know you will like.

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